I went to the gas station to get a couple bottles of gatorade.
I get in line behind this thirty-something lady who's counting out change for her Twix bar and grape-flavore Jungle Juice.
Change meaning all change. Quarters, nickels, dimes AND pennies.
I wait...
And wait...
Several more people line up behind me.
We wait...
And wait...
Now don't get me wrong - I've been there. I've had to count change to pay for stuff. And sometimes I haven't had enough change to pay.
But for the love of all that's holy, lady! You've counted it SEVEN times already and counting it once more is NOT going to turn eighty-nine cents into $1.24!
After about five minutes, I'd had enough. (And let me state, I would've offered the owed money earlier, but the woman was kind of hunched over and ashamed looking and I didn't want to embarrass her or anything.)
"Here's a dollar ma'am," I say politely (and very quietly) just as the woman is on the verge of starting yet another re-count.
She flips her head around and glares at me.
"You think I don't got money?" she demands.
*blink*
Taken aback, I just look at her for a second.
"Um, no ma'am, I was just..."
"Cuz I gots money! Now why in HELL would you think I don't got no money, huh? Cuz I ain't white like you?"
Hmmm... I thought she was white. She looked white. I wanted to ask her what color she was, but decided against it.
She continued to rant. "I got me some money. I don't know why you think I ain't got no money!"
Finally, I snapped back: "Because I'd hate to think you're holding all of us up while you just clean out your damn purse!"
Bitch.
Then I get to come home to packing up crap and cleaning up vomit. (Both kids suddenly get struck with a horrendous flu a day and a half before we move.)
'Course I make time to post my run-in with the crazy lady first.
For prosterity's sake, you know...
Damn I hate packing.
Friday, August 29, 2008
May I introduce myself?
I am the word slinger.
A slinger, by definition, is one who participates in the act of throwing, casting, hurling or flinging.
And that's what I do.
Not with my fists. Or rocks. Or knives.
But with words.
I've learned to control my mouth, but put a pen in my hand and it's all over.
I've been a blogger at OpenDiary for many, many years and my readers there can vouch for the fact that sometimes my entries tend to ramble on and on with much ado about nothing.
I try to convince myself that it's just part of my charm.
It's hard to move blogging spots. OD has become a limb on my family tree -I've laughed and cried with some of those people for the better half of a decade- and it wasn't an easy decision to leave. There were just so many problems there. Technical problems. And yes, the overseerers worked their butts off to fix them all in good time, but sometimes you just have to move on for your own peace of mind.
And this seemed as good a time as any.
I'm moving this week-end.
A new house, a new job, a new blog spot.
New is good.
Scary, but good.
I'm a waitress by trade and a writer at heart.
I'm a single mother to two teen-aged daughters.
I'm the grandmother to a bossy, aging feline named Sassy.
I probably have one of the most dysfunctional families in the tri-state area.
I write obsessively about all of them.
I also read obsessively.
Any book you put in my head, I'll read.
I may not like it, but I'll give it a shot.
I'm a Christian.
I cuss when angry, lie when absolutely necessary, watch trashy reality television shows, love R-rated movies, smoke cigarettes, and can't make it through the Old Testament.
But I believe in God.
I believe Jesus died on the cross for our sins.
I believe that He rose from the dead and ascended into Heaven.
I'm a sinner, but I still believe.
I'll probably end up posting more than a few of my OD entries up here, not only so I don't have to spend time typing a whole lot of back stories that have already been typed, but also because I like to have my stuff in the same place.
Did I mention that I'm a procrastinator?
I have to move in two days and I haven't packed anything but a few odds and ends.
I was going to start yesterday, but someone turned me on to a blog called Waiter Rant and I read four years worth of blogs in twelve hours.
He's hilarious and totally worth the chaos that will undoubtably occur when moving day finally arrives.
So I should scram.
Now.
A slinger, by definition, is one who participates in the act of throwing, casting, hurling or flinging.
And that's what I do.
Not with my fists. Or rocks. Or knives.
But with words.
I've learned to control my mouth, but put a pen in my hand and it's all over.
I've been a blogger at OpenDiary for many, many years and my readers there can vouch for the fact that sometimes my entries tend to ramble on and on with much ado about nothing.
I try to convince myself that it's just part of my charm.
It's hard to move blogging spots. OD has become a limb on my family tree -I've laughed and cried with some of those people for the better half of a decade- and it wasn't an easy decision to leave. There were just so many problems there. Technical problems. And yes, the overseerers worked their butts off to fix them all in good time, but sometimes you just have to move on for your own peace of mind.
And this seemed as good a time as any.
I'm moving this week-end.
A new house, a new job, a new blog spot.
New is good.
Scary, but good.
I'm a waitress by trade and a writer at heart.
I'm a single mother to two teen-aged daughters.
I'm the grandmother to a bossy, aging feline named Sassy.
I probably have one of the most dysfunctional families in the tri-state area.
I write obsessively about all of them.
I also read obsessively.
Any book you put in my head, I'll read.
I may not like it, but I'll give it a shot.
I'm a Christian.
I cuss when angry, lie when absolutely necessary, watch trashy reality television shows, love R-rated movies, smoke cigarettes, and can't make it through the Old Testament.
But I believe in God.
I believe Jesus died on the cross for our sins.
I believe that He rose from the dead and ascended into Heaven.
I'm a sinner, but I still believe.
I'll probably end up posting more than a few of my OD entries up here, not only so I don't have to spend time typing a whole lot of back stories that have already been typed, but also because I like to have my stuff in the same place.
Did I mention that I'm a procrastinator?
I have to move in two days and I haven't packed anything but a few odds and ends.
I was going to start yesterday, but someone turned me on to a blog called Waiter Rant and I read four years worth of blogs in twelve hours.
He's hilarious and totally worth the chaos that will undoubtably occur when moving day finally arrives.
So I should scram.
Now.
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